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WHAT THE WOOSH?!? Scientists Stumped by Arrival of Brand New Species on Earth - the WOOSHI!Mischievous Species Suddenly Manifest Throughout the World! TORONTO, April 1, 2023 /CNW/ - Scientists are baffled by the sudden arrival of a new species of creature at a number of landmark locations all around the world! Apparently called the Wooshi (Woooooooo-sheeeeee), scientists theorize that the Wooshi may well have originated in the heretofore only theoretical dimension of Gor. Since their discovery, researchers have determined that while the Wooshi are generally well-intentioned, their enthusiasm, energy, and general ham-handedness can make for chaotic and frenetic outcomes for the people they come into contact with – BEWARE THE WOOSHI!!! An unprecedented discovery, the Wooshi are neither animal or mineral (but slightly bigger than a breadbox), and while still undefined zoologically, they can be described to be short in stature (stocky comes to mind), concerningly if not annoyingly intelligent (bordering on cocky), and apparently fluent in English! Having mysteriously popped up at multiple locations globally, scientists are still struggling to confirm the exact number of Wooshi amongst us, but they guesstimate an oddly exact headcount of 11,111 Wooshi currently on Earth – HOW MANY MORE MIGHT COME?!? "The Wooshi appear to be generally social (and sociable) creatures, each with unique sets of characteristics related to their behavior, survivability, headwear, eyewear and occasionally their musical accessories, and differences in color and texture," says John Paul Clavicle, Associate Researcher at Perly's Cartography & Biodiversity Institute. "Although we find them to be mischievous and chaotic, they are strangely hypnotic – we cannot help but be fascinated and attracted to these anarchic interlopers!" First appearing in a variety of notable locations around the globe, such as the Eiffel Tower in France, the Great Pyramid in Egypt, and the living room of Co-Founder and CEO of Toshiverse L4bs, Cole Gurman, the Wooshi have demonstrated an uncanny ability to adapt to new and disparate environments, including the deep pile of the shag carpeting that dominates theGurman residence. "They just barged into my house one day," says Gurman. "They started to rearrange my furniture, frolic in my socks and underwear, and perform Broadway show tunes using my pots and pans – things like that. I wasn't a huge fan of their choice of musicals, but beyond that they were decent company – they tend to grow on you… and crawl, and walk, and splay…" Please stay tuned for exciting updates! Toshiverse L4bs, the team behind the Wooshi World brand are stirring up new ideas for the inhabitants of the island of Gor, including new content, product launches, and more! To stay up to date with Wooshi World, please visit us on our official site and social channels:
About Toshiverse Labs About Wooshi and Wooshi World This non-factual news release is issued by Toshiverse Labs and is an acknowledged spoof press release for April Fool's Day!
SOURCE Toshiverse Labs ![]() |