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San Bernardino County Sun, Calif., John Weeks columnMay 12, 2013 (San Bernardino County Sun - McClatchy-Tribune Information Services via COMTEX) -- Having fixed all its other problems, San Bernardino now is committing all its resources to busting pot shops. These are among the few stores left in San Bernardino that actually do any business, so it's important to root them out, so the city's bottom line can be kept at the bottom. The sale of medical marijuana is legal in California, but the state Supreme Court now has ruled that cities can use local zoning ordinances to shut down dispensaries if they choose to do so. San Bernardino chooses to do so, and is going after the easy pickings with unusual gusto. You know, I hear all the talk about how the availability of medical marijuana is driving an upsurge in drug use and contributing to an epidemic of crime, and ruining all hopes for a peaceful society. But I don't know. The only outbreak of hostile behavior involving potheads I ever witnessed took place a long time ago, and didn't amount to much. I watched two buddies argue with great vehemence for most of two or three minutes, though it must have seemed like hours to them, over the vital issue of which record album to play next: Jefferson Airplane or Jethro Tull. I swear, things actually might have come to blows if not for the fact that the two combatants both were digging deeply with their hands into a giant bag of tortilla chips. I must say, however, that despite this one shocking incident, I never have heard any news about unruly potheads terrorizing society. There may be lots of stories about stoners running amok in this or that village, looting and pillaging, but I've missed all of them, I guess. Now, we soon shall see whether shutting down the pot shops brings a new era of peace and prosperity to San Bernardino. And, believe me, if it does, I am going to suggest we expand the cleanup campaign to include other potentially dangerous businesses. That's right, once we get these potheads under control, we won't stop there. Most of you don't know it, because you are respectable members of the community, but every grocery store in the land offers for sale a giddy assortment of attractively packaged poisons that, if ingested, will cause great sickness and possible death. In fact, probable death. I am referring, of course, to insecticides, bleaches and spot removers. Unlike marijuana, which is a natural inhabitant of God's splendid creation, insecticides and bleaches and spot removers are artificial toxic chemical potions that absolutely are not part of nature. In fact, they are anti-nature, created in the laboratories of man for the express purpose of destroying natural manifestations such as bugs, dirt and stains. The fact that any 6-year-old child with pocket money can walk into one of these so-called businesses and purchase these lethal substances is beyond belief. We not only must shut down the grocery stores, we also must put a stop to hardware stores. Many of you may not know it, being the upstanding citizens that you are, but these seemingly innocent establishments are filled with axes, hatchets, pitchforks and even chainsaws. It's like a horror show in there! Why these dens of lethal terror are allowed to exist in our fragile society is a mystery to me. If they are padlocked tomorrow, it won't be too soon. But our work still won't be done. Please take a seat, gentle reader, and try to remain calm, because I now must tell you that there are certain unsavory quarters, located in every city of our beloved America, where you actually can buy guns. You heard me correctly. Guns. Unlike marijuana, which is a leafy plant that never is mentioned in news stories as a murder weapon, guns are devices intentionally made for the express purpose of destroying life. It may be hard to believe that there are venues, open to the public, that sell these items to paying customers, but it's true. And it's shocking. I'm sure that all of you who believe it's important that we immediately put a stop to the medical marijuana dispensaries will join me in an urgent campaign to also shut down the grocery stores, hardware stores and gun stores. Our future depends on it. Oh, and speaking of the future, where's that other giant bag of tortilla chips Read more John Weeks at http://sbsun.com/johnweeks. Contact him by email at [email protected]. ___ (c)2013 the San Bernardino County Sun (San Bernardino, Calif.) Visit the San Bernardino County Sun (San Bernardino, Calif.) at www.sbsun.com Distributed by MCT Information Services |