[June 28, 2011] A little etiquette goes a long way Tweet Jun 10, 2011 (The Daily News - McClatchy-Tribune Information Services via COMTEX) -- With high school grads getting ready to turn the tassels, it might be a good time to give proper conduct a little consideration. Though there are no firm and fast rules about what is and is not appropriate with regard to graduations, Donald Williams of Jacksonville thinks there are manners to fit the occasion. Williams, who is actively involved in the Onslow Cotillion in training and teaching young men and women about behavior and what is appropriate, says he thinks many would agree with him that there are people who could behave better than they do at commencements. "I know sometimes it is hot, and the ceremonies are long, but this is a serious ceremony and it should be taken seriously," he said. "It is important for graduates and those in attendance to show respect for the graduates by being quiet and being still." While Williams appreciates and understands the need to applaud, he said there are many sounds that are not fitting. "I've heard air horns go off, and certainly that is a distraction," he said. "You have to have consideration for everyone that is there, and anything other than applause is not acceptable." Williams said he believes there should be a modicum of decorum in clothing choices made by those attending the ceremonies. "In the old days our parents and guests showed up dressed like they did when they were going out for the evening," he said. "You don't have to get all dressed up in your Sunday finest, but dress in something appropriate to the occasion that acknowledges the seriousness of the affair at least. "It may be tempting to wear shorts or jeans, but it is not appropriate." He suggests choosing an outfit that is comfortable and cool, but not provocative or too casual. "When I go somewhere where I am not sure what I should wear I always err on the side of being overdressed rather than underdressed," he said. In the age of cell phones and texting, Williams says during the ceremony graduates and attendees should disconnect. "No one wants to hear a cell phone go off, and there isn't any call you can't do without for a couple hours -- I say turn them off, that way you don't know if you are getting a call," he said. "If you are texting or take a call the message you are sending is this is more important than you are; that is not a message you want to send." And those who absolutely need to take or make a call should excuse themselves from the ceremony. "Take it in private," he said. When it comes to gift-giving Williams said a person receiving a graduation announcement or invitation should not feel obligated to give a gift. "I think it should be what you want to do; how well you know the person," he said. However, he does feel the graduate should be acknowledged with at least a card of congratulations in these instances. And graduates, he says, if you receive a gift it is appropriate to send a written thank you note -- and send it soon. "It is so easy to write a thank you note. It just has to be a few lines and it should be on nice stationary or a note card," he said. "It is much easier to write a thank you within a day or two rather than way after the fact ... and I have never heard anybody say they hated getting a thank you." Last but not least, Williams encourages graduates to give time to their parents and family members before running off to be with friends on graduation night. "They have made an investment in time and money ... Feel obliged to honor everybody, they made sacrifices too," he said. "Make time for them as you make time for friends." To see more of The Daily News, or to subscribe to the newspaper, go to http://www.jdnews.com. Copyright (c) 2011, The Daily News, Jacksonville, N.C. Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services. For more information about the content services offered by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services (MCT), visit www.mctinfoservices.com. [ Back To TMCnet.com's Homepage ]