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Hush and don't flush when phone in useSep 07, 2009 (Detroit Free Press - McClatchy-Tribune Information Services via COMTEX) -- You've got questions about cell phone etiquette and Mr. Answer Man has the answers. QUESTION: What do you do when a coworker or a friend has an obnoxious cell phone ring but that person is never around to answer their phone, forcing you to listen to some stupid, annoying song that seems to grow louder by the second? MR. ANSWER MAN: The only proper thing to do is to smash the phone with a hammer. QUESTION: Why do so many people sit in Comerica Park, watching the Tigers while talking on their phones? MR. ANSWER MAN: These people are annoying beyond belief. They should herd them into one section of the stadium where they can all be together, like the smokers in the smoking section. QUESTION: What is the most disturbing trend among cell phone users? MR. ANSWER MAN: Oh boy. Don't get me started. A few weeks ago, I was in a public bathroom and I heard a guy in another stall, sitting on the toilet, talking on a cell phone. Which just creeps me out. Although it seems to happen more and more. Over the last few months, I've heard several people, in different bathrooms, talking on their phones. According to etiquette published by the National Association of Cell Phone Bathroom Users, you should follow these guidelines when you encounter somebody talking on the phone in a public bathroom: 1. Try to avoid listening to their conversation. 2. Never flush your toilet. 3. Try to, um, keep all noises to a minimum. But I've never been a big fan of etiquette, so I sat and listened. "I love you," the guy said, near the end of the conversation. Which, you know, just about brought a tear to my eye -- because they say romance is dead. Being an absolute jerk and something of a vigilante against cell phone use in public bathrooms, I didn't even hesitate. I flushed as the guy continued talking. If it's possible to flush loudly, that's what I tried to do. The guy kept talking, right through my flush. Which brings up so many intriguing questions: Did the person on the other end of his call hear my flush? Was this person mortified? And if not, why doesn't this bother anybody? What does this say about our society? Have we totally accepted cell phone bathroom talk? Do we really need to do business, as they say, while we do our business? Or is this just a guy thing? Do women sit in a public bathroom and talk on cell phones, too? By the way, do women even sit on public toilets? I have been told that some women prefer to hover like a helicopter, and if they are, indeed, hovering in public bathrooms, how in the heck can they do that and talk on a cell phone, too? It boggles the mind. That's some serious agility. But women are amazing like that. Anyhow, I hope we can all agree: Sometimes, it's safer, not to mention more polite for everyone, just to send a text message. Contact JEFF SEIDEL: 313-223-4558 or [email protected] To see more of the Detroit Free Press, or to subscribe to the newspaper, go to http://www.freep.com Copyright (c) 2009, Detroit Free Press Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services. For reprints, email [email protected], call 800-374-7985 or 847-635-6550, send a fax to 847-635-6968, or write to The Permissions Group Inc., 1247 Milwaukee Ave., Suite 303, Glenview, IL 60025, USA. |